Yingle Bells

People have asked me for lyrics to Yingle Bells.

This is Bro. Simon's adaptation from a previous performance.
I also found that you can find the lyrics with some variation online, written originally by "Yogi Yorgesson" (Harry Stewart), but I like it this way.

So to fulfill my promise, here they are:

My wife says to me, Lets not take the Chevrolet
Let's hitch up vonce again to the one horse open sleigh.
But the horse was awful bad, If he could talk he’d say
You’ll be sorry you hitched me to a the von horse open sleigh.

O yingle Bells, yingle bells, yingaling all der vay,
It ain’t like it used to be in the von horse open sleigh, Hey,
Yingle bells, yingle bells, yingaling all der vay,
I should have vorn long uundervear in the von horse open sleigh.

Dashing through the snow, vith the cold vind in our face,
I can’t hold de horse, he tinks he in a race.
He kicks snow on us, it hits us in the shest,
Dat makes us the coldest folks, living in the vest.

O Yingle Bells, yingle bells, yingaling all derv ay,
My vife sure hates sleigh bells since her face face was froze dis way.
Yingle Bells, yingle Bells, yingaling all derv ay,
I guess so much for riding in dat von horse open sleigh.

Da night is awful dark, can’t see beyond my nose,
I can’t blink my eyes, my eyeballs must be froze.
Can’t hear my dear vife yell, I cannot see her face,
I guess ve must have lost her ven we turned at Simon's place.

O Yingle Bells, yingle bells, yingaling all der vay,
I nearly caught puh new mone yah in da von horse open sleigh.
O, Yingle Bells, yingle Bells, yingaling all der vay,
I vouldn't make brass monkeys ride, in the von horse open sleigh.